(1) Contest Winner shall not look at or speak to Michael Jeffrey Jordan outside of the sanctioned activity discussed in paragraph 4.
(2) Contest Winner shall not play golf with Mr. Jordan.
(3) Contest Winner shall not ask Mr. Jordan to sign any paraphernalia, merchandise, or personal effects.
(4) Contest Winner is entitled to one (1) handshake with Mr. Jordan; one (1) exchange of pleasantries with Mr. Jordan not to exceed three (3) discrete sentences spoken to Mr. Jordan, and allowed to occur only between 8:00 AM and 8:15 AM on the initial morning of the Michael Jordan Celebrity Invitational; and one (1) farewell directed to Mr. Jordan, which shall take form solely as "Thank you for being such a great guy. It was nice to meet you." All other interaction is strictly forbidden.
(5) Contest Winner shall not photograph or record Mr. Jordan, nor any of Mr. Jordan's guests, including, but not limited to, Charles Barkley, Charles Oakley, and Tiger Woods.
(6) Contest Winner shall not participate in, photograph, or record any gambling, adult entertainment, sexual intercourse, amorous circumstance short of intercourse, sexual assault, or simultaneous combination of the preceding activities.
(7) Hanes, Mr. Jordan, and the Michael Jordan Celebrity Invitational shall not be held responsible for any gambling losses or other adverse circumstance incurred by Contest Winner during term of the promotion. "Adverse circumstance" shall include, but not be limited to: death, illness, assault, slap administered by Mr. Oakley.
(8) Contest Winner shall neither inquire about nor even mention: Kwame Brown, the Washington Wizards, the 1995 NBA playoffs, the awkward clawing fight with Reggie Miller, the Birmingham Barrons, the Jordan IX, any Jordan model after XIV, Juanita Jordan, the years 1999 through the present.
(9) Contest Winner shall wear Hanes underwear, Hanes t-shirt, Jordan Brand top, Jordan Brand bottom, and Jordan XX3 at all times.
(10) At no time shall Contest Winner inquire as to why Jordan Brand has diluted the value of its original lineup by retroing or simply ruining its Air Jordan line of sneakers.
(11) Contest Winner is required to spend entire duration of the promotion alongside Carlos Irwin Estevez, d/b/a "Charlie Sheen." Mr. Sheen is required to comply with all rules established herein, along with any preexisting court orders. (12) Hanes, Mr. Jordan, and the Michael Jordan Celebrity Invitational reserve the right to cancel the contest at any time, up to and including the Tournament's final hole. Further, the aforestated parties reserve the right to eject Contest Winner from the sovereign nation of the Bahamas at any time for any cause, or without cause. (13) Violation of any terms stipulated in paragraphs 1 through 12 shall constitute grounds for immediate ejection from the sovereign nation of the Bahamas. No compensation or reimbursement shall be provided. Charlie Sheen must be taken with Contest Winner upon ejection.
Been a wild time, lately. Lots of traveling, lots of good times, and little blogging. My bad. Friends and family and Pearl Jam wait for no man.
More bad news: school starts tomorrow. I am going to be very busy this semester--homework; extracurricular things; extracurricular things for stuff other than school (think: writing elsewhere); weddings (just about everyone I know is either married, engaged, or about to be); trying to find a job; mentally preparing for Lost. Being this busy and this engaged, in school and in life, is a great thing. It's as exciting as it is intimidating. But I'll need a little time to sort out my schedule so that I can handle my b-i and keep SB poppin'. A few changes may be in store. Maybe more guest posts, maybe more brevity. Good news, though, is that god invented Twitter. Keep checking that.
Been tied up with some personal business--Lollapalooza (good review here), law-school stuff, etc. Sorry, peeps. Back to business later today.
For now, let me just say that this Rick Pitino circumstance is tough to process. Pitino was a really good coach with the Knicks, was innovative at Kentucky, and was always a stand-up dude. For a decade or more, he's always seemed to make the right decision, say the right thing, and do it with a genuine humanity that was endearing. Now, some of that upstanding-ness is compromised, and it diminishes my appreciation of the man. Kind of a bummer, even in this era of sports figures who are routinely revealed as falliable, if not (more often) generally dislikable.
Not to always belabor this point, but the St. Louis hip-hop scene to which I have access is underwhelming. What this means: I am in law school. It's restrictive and insulating. I go to class, I go to the library, I get a little exercise, I eat some food, I do my homework, and I zone out on my couch before bed. I check the internets as I can. I'll go to the movies some nights, or hit the bar with some friends. Law school is like high school with a more complicated, less diverse curriculum, so I can't ever escape the same 200-odd people. I make a plan with a few friends, they tell their respective friends, and suddenly a dinner has become an outing of socially inept, self-medicating neurotics who all hope to work 80 hours a week for a few years.
In the summer, there's no homework, but there is more socializing. Concepts that are foreign between September and May--leisure reading, regular writing, meeting new people, relaxing just because you can, finding fun--return.
Doesn't leave a lot of time to get out with the local peeps and find the real hip-hop heads, you know? I am at the mercy of the radio and whatever random shreds I happen upon. Plus, what's there to find? St. Louis is a horrible live-music town, and I'm not sure I'd even want to roll with the local rap fans based upon the prevailing regional tastes. And forget law school--the true rap fans, not just the dude who likes Talib because he's "so much realer," are few and far between. Thankfully, the lord invented the internets, where I interact with hip-hop, its fans, and the echo chamber we've created.
Among the biggest things on the internets right now is Slaughterhouse. And rightfully so. Aside from Joe Budden, whom I think is eh, the group is tantamount to an underground hip-hop superfriends. And a few years ago, one of the biggest things among a few internets was the Ed O.G. album My Own Worst Enemy (which I still bump). It's only fitting, then, that today's BTY showdown pits underground, internets favorites against each other. I know Dallas will be pleased.
So, who you with? Each sort of does its job. Ed O is steady, deliberate grown-ass-man rap; the Slaughterhouse joint is just as furious as you'd hope it would be.
I have no idea if Michigan will be good at football this season. I am fairly certain that it can be any worse than last year, but that might not mean so much. The football coverage rambling is going to pick up around these parts now that we're less than five weeks away from kickoff.
As we ease our way into things, here's backup running back Mike Cox putting it down. Should any games be resolved via combo-back dance-off, I like UM's chances.
Just read Dwele's tweet that Baatin of Slum Village has passed away. This is a sad day. T3 is the last living member of the original Slum Village, a group that has always loomed large in my life. SV is greater than it's music. The group is emblematic of a sound and a region, yet even that isn't enough. For me, Slum Village has long represented a strain of music, and a particular attitude about making rap records, that eschews so much of the bullshit which passes as music culture. SV is something better than that. This sentiment in inextricably linked to Jay Dilla's legacy, and there's something sweet and honest about it. Baatin will now assume some of that meaning, however melancholy it is that his death was the precipitating incident.
As a rapper, Baatin was playful, colorful, witty. His voice, though nasally, also was clear and striking, his verses engrossing and memorable. He is already missed.
